“A man cannot be comfortable without his own self-approval.”

Mark Twain

One of the reasons we play music is to have a better life. We want to study and grow. We relish meaningful work.

But even though we’re in it for the right reasons, it can sometimes feel like we’ve “gotten behind”.

One of Eckhart Tolle’s definitions of ‘stress’ is thinking, “I should be doing something else.” Here, stress stems from thinking what we’re currently doing is wrong, or not enough.

If we set expectations to practice two hours a day, and only get in one hour, we’ve failed. When it takes “longer than it should” to learn something, we don’t feel successful.

And when we label our work “failure”, it doesn’t feel good.

Twain observes that we need to approve of ourselves to be truly comfortable.

This short, pithy phrase can be a powerful tool when we feel dishearted or frustrated with our music. We can explore where we “don’t approve” of ourselves. And when we find it, we can check for unrealistic expectations.

We can lower the bar to success, and enjoy more of it. We can define success as simply picking up the instrument and playing one note or chord.

When we do, we build more momentum and enthusiasm. And these lead to better focus, faster learning, and a more rewarding musical life.

We play music for fun. Setting attainable goals helps keep it that way.

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own self-approval.”

Mark Twain